Towards uncharted waters

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“A ship in harbour is safe — but that is not what ships are built for. So said an American author by the name of John A. Shedd.”

“And what, pray, has that to do with writing software?”

“It’s allegorical. It means if you do what you’re supposed to do, it won’t get you anywhere. So you’ve got to do something unexpected.”

“Such as?”

“I don’t know. What are you supposed to do? What do people expect you to do?”

“Sorry to state the obvious, old chap, but what people expect a software developer to do is develop software.”

“And?”

“And that’s what I’m doing. What more are you looking for?”

“What do you do with the software once it’s ready.”

“After development and various testing stages, I submit it to Apple and Google to have it available in their app stores.”

“And that’s it?”

“Of course.”

“And you sell it for how much?”

“Three pounds ninety-nine.”

“And how much of that do you see.”

“I can’t tell you that.”

“Because you don’t know?”

“Because it’s commercially sensitive – and a little embarrassing, if I’m honest. But it’s the best route to market for mobile apps.”

“And how many apps in the stores do the same as yours?”

“A few. Quite a few, actually, but I aim to be the best and highest rated.”

“So, if I understand you, in a sea of little fish, you want to be the best little fish.”

“I suppose – or maybe a bigger fish.”

“Be a turtle.”

“What?”

“You heard. Be a turtle. Do something completely different, something exceptional. Be a leader, not a follower. Be daring. When everyone else is jumping off the low board at the side of the pool, don’t just dive from the ten metre board, go cliff-diving in Mexico. When everybody else is using a snorkel to dive down to three metres, don’t put on scuba gear and dive to thirty, get into a deep-sea submersible and explore the ocean floor.”

“But isn’t that a bit—”

“No, it’s a lot — but the greater the risk, the greater the reward.”

“Who said that?”

“I did. Didn’t you hear? Want another one? Try nothing ventured, nothing gained. Or what about a faint heart never won a fair maiden. Ooh, I’ve thought of another one—”

“Enough, already. You’ve made your point. I’ll talk to the bank, see if I can get a loan.”

“No! Don’t do that. Not at first, anyway. Spend what time you have to on your mobile apps to keep cash coming in, but invest your remaining time wisely. Set up a project outline and try for crowdfunding. You could be the next Dorsey or Zuckerberg.”

“Hmm. Food for thought.”

“No, my friend. Food for action. Now, weigh anchor, cast off, set a course and get under way.”


This was written in response to Kreative Kue 271 published on this site.

Hounded

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You know that I think your dog’s great
(When she’s safely behind your front gate)
Well, it seems that she’s out
And wandering about
And I think she wants me for her plate

There’s no need for you to feel dread
It’s well after ten, she’s been fed
She’s in a good mood
She’s well stuffed with food
Just leave her, she’ll go to her bed

Sincerely, I do beg your pardon
But your precious is now in my garden
I’ve had to scamper
On top of my camper
And the climb up that ladder’s a hard ‘un.

Let me tell you a thing ’bout my pet
As a Staffy, she’s soft as you’ll get
She’s cuddly and warm
And never does harm.
Come down from your perch and don’t fret.

I hear what you’re saying to me, Ma’am
And I know how you love your wee lamb
I will feel better
As soon as you get her
Till then, I’ll stay right where I am.


This was written in response to Kreative Kue 270 published on this site.

Rumbled

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“Okay, Boss. Why have you put me in here?”

“Well, you know I do this blog—”

“Rhymes with dog – yeah, I know. What of it?”

“And every Monday I put up a picture so people can write a story or poem or whatever that the picture suggests.”

“You’ve told me about it before so, yes, you could say I know about it.”

“Well. I just thought a photograph of you in the box might make a good starting point for a story.”

“A story about a dog in a cardboard box?”

“Not exactly that…”

“Oh no. I think I see where this is going. Me being a Jack Russell, you thought putting me in a box would… Tell me, boss, how desperate are you for pictures?”

“This is number two hundred and sixty-nine and it’s getting harder every week. I really don’t want to reuse any if I can avoid it.”

“So you thought a Jack in the—”

“Don’t say that!”

“Don’t say what?”

“You know…”

“Jack-in-the-box?”

“Yeah, that.”

“Why not?”

“I was saving that for my punchline.”


This was written in response to Kreative Kue 269 published on this site.