Kreative Kue 280

Kreative Kue 279 asked for submissions based on this photograph:

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John W Howell is a multiple nominated and award-winning author who blogs at Fiction Favorites. Details of John’s books can be found on his Amazon author page

It’s a job by John W. Howell © 2020

“Hold that ladder steady.”

“I got it.”

“What the hell. I can’t see a thing with this faceguard on.”

“You know the rules.”

“Yeah, I do. Still seems stupid.”

“You have to make sure you don’t become infected.”

“I know, I know it’s just hard to see is all.”

“Can you see the point of contamination?”

“Not really. Everything up here looks the same. Oh, wait. I think I see it. I’m going to deploy the antibacterial now.”

“Make sure you cover the area totally.”

“I’ve been doing this since you were in diapers. I got this.”

“Just trying to help.”

“I know. I’m sorry. This suit is so damn hot too.”

“You ready to come down?”

“I think so.”

“How did that spot get contaminated anyway?”

“From the report, the guy was coming in for a landing and then hit this pole.”

“That had to hurt.”

“Yeah, he is still in the hospital.”

“Tested positive I suppose.”

“Yup.”

“Which virus?”

“Human being.”

“OMG the worst.”

“I know right? Okay, hold on. I’m ready to come down.”


My effort was

How do you like them apples?

“What’s in this spray, Cap’n?”

“Don’t worry, Jean-Marie, it’ll do the job.”

“What is the job?”

“There’s a hole in the post. Just spray into it until you’ve emptied the bottle.”

“Then what?”

“Then duck.”

“Duck? Why?”

“See those apple trees behind you?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you like apples?”

“Like apples? I love ’em.”

“Let’s just say you’re not the only one likes them.”

“I know the householder does – in fact I suppose most people like apples. Big industry around here. These apples sell all over the world.”

“I know. That’s part of the plan.”

“What plan?”

“Sorry, Jean-Marie. I’ve said too much already. Just get on with the job, will you?”

“You didn’t say why I should duck.”

“Oh that. That’ll be because that spray is going to annoy the occupants of that hole and some of them may come out.”

“Who lives in there?”

“It isn’t who, it’s what. Hornets.”

“HORNETS?”

“Yeah, hornets.”

“Lots of them?”

“A whole nest-full, I should think.”

“But that’s about—”

“Between two and four hundred…”

“Hornets? Between two and four hundred hornets‽”

“That’s why you’ve got the protective gear on.”

“And why it’s me up here and not you?”

“Rank has its privileges, Jean-Marie. You’ll make captain one day—”

“If I survive this lot!”

“You are wearing protective clothing, Corporal. Now do your job.”

“Yes Sir. Okay, iFans. Let’s see how you like these apples!”


Rhino saw us!

On to this week’s challenge: Using this photo as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.

How do you like them apples?

P1030328a

“What’s in this spray, Cap’n?”

“Don’t worry, Jean-Marie, it’ll do the job.”

“What is the job?”

“There’s a hole in the post. Just spray into it until you’ve emptied the bottle.”

“Then what?”

“Then duck.”

“Duck? Why?”

“See those apple trees behind you?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you like apples?”

“Like apples? I love ’em.”

“Let’s just say you’re not the only one likes them.”

“I know the householder does – in fact I suppose most people like apples. Big industry around here. These apples sell all over the world.”

“I know. That’s part of the plan.”

“What plan?”

“Sorry, Jean-Marie. I’ve said too much already. Just get on with the job, will you?”

“You didn’t say why I should duck.”

“Oh that. That’ll be because that spray is going to annoy the occupants of that hole and some of them may come out.”

“Who lives in there?”

“It isn’t who, it’s what. Hornets.”

“HORNETS?”

“Yeah, hornets.”

“Lots of them?”

“A whole nest-full, I should think.”

“But that’s about—”

“Between two and four hundred…”

“Hornets? Between two and four hundred hornets‽”

“That’s why you’ve got the protective gear on.”

“And why it’s me up here and not you?”

“Rank has its privileges, Jean-Marie. You’ll make captain one day—”

“If I survive this lot!”

“You are wearing protective clothing, Corporal. Now do your job.”

“Yes Sir. Okay, iFans. Let’s see how you like these apples!”


This was written in response to Kreative Kue 279 published on this site.

Kreative Kue 279

Kreative Kue 278 asked for submissions based on this photograph:

DSCF0587a

John W Howell is a multiple nominated and award-winning author who blogs at Fiction Favorites. Details of John’s books can be found on his Amazon author page

Rescue me by John W. Howell © 2020

“Come on boy. You can do it, boy.”

“The name’s Roscoe. Call me Roscoe.”

“Come on Roscoe. You can do it.”

“I know I can do it. My feet are touching the bottom. See I’m walking in.”

“Okay, you are almost here. Halleluiah I’m saved.”

“Saved what are you talking about? You having a soulful experience over there?”

“You are a rescue dog aren’t you?”

“Whaaaaat? Rescue dog?”

“Yeah, even your name screams rescue. Roscoe rescue.”

“How long you been on this island, Mate?”

“Hard to tell. What year is it?”

“2020.”

“Yikes. my boat foundered and sank in 2018.”

“Well, genius looks like you have been here for two years. I like what you’ve done to the place.”

“So you are not a rescue dog/”

“Look at me, Bud. I couldn’t rescue myself let alone some hayseed your size.”

“Well, at least it is nice to have someone to talk to. Want some tea?”

“You know Sport. You are dumber than you look. How many dogs you know drink tea?”

“Well, none.”

“Yes, that’s right. Also, let me ask you a question.”

“Okay, shoot.”

“How many dogs you know talk?”

“Again none.”

“So maybe you better take stock, Rube. Ya think you might be having a hallucination?”

“You have got to be kidding. I watched you swim from the horizon to here.”

“So whats that fifty miles you think?”

“Seems difficult but you are a rescue dog.”

“Wake up Ferd. Go ahead and touch me.”

“Oh, my. My hand went right through you.”

“What does that tell you?”

“I’m just dreaming.”

“Now you got it. One last question.”

“Sure, might as well.”

“Why a dog hallucination?”

“What do you mean?”

“You could dream up anyone. Why a dog?”

“Man’s best friend I suppose. ”

“You are hopeless. Okay, I’ll take the tea. Darjeeling I hope. A little milk no sugar. Got scones?”


My effort was

Arrival

“♫ It’s a long way to Tipperary, It’s a long way to go ♫”

“What’re you singing, little fellah?”

“It’s an old marching song.”

“Why are you singing a marching song?”

“Duh! Cos I’m on a march. Obviously.”

“Looks more like you’re on a swim.”

“Okay, so this lake was in the way. I swam across it so I didn’t have to walk all the way around it.”

“Why not?”

“It’s a long way.”

“Like to Tipperary?”

“Don’t be smart!”

“Ooh, thanks. No-one’s ever accused me of being smart before.”

“I wonder why…”

“It’s cos I’m a bit slow.”

“I wasn’t asking. I was musing.”

“I’m not laughing.”

“Okay. Why don’t you sit there and see if you can work out why the water is always wetter at the weekend than during the week. I’m off. Places to go, people to see, things to do. Bye.  ♫ It’s a long way to Tipperary And the sweetest girl I know! ♫”

“STOP. Wait.”

“What?”

“What if the water isn’t always wetter at the weekend than during the week?”

“Isn’t it? Okay. See if you can work out why it isn’t.”

“Okay.”

“♫ Farewell to Piccadilly, Goodbye, Leicester Square! ♫”

“No, wait”

“Now what?”

“Where are you going, why, and can I come with you?”

“Where? America. Why? Cos I heard their president say it’s the best country on earth and he said our country is a something-or-other hole and if a bloke like that can be president there’s no limit to what a [insert you own adjectives here] person could do. Can you come too? Only if you know all the words to this song. Bye. ♫ It’s a long long way to Tipperary, But my heart’s right there. ♫”

“Won’t you at least tell me where you’ve come from?”

“CHIHUAHUA!”


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On to this week’s challenge: Using this photo as inspiration, write a short story, flash fiction, scene, poem; anything, really; even just a caption for the photograph. Either put it (or a link to it) in a comment or email it to me at keithchanning@gmail.com before 6pm next Sunday (if you aren’t sure what the time is where I live, this link will tell you). If you post it on your own blog or site, a link to this page would be appreciated, but please do also mention it in a comment here.

Go on. You know you want to. Let your creativity and imagination soar. I shall display the entries next Monday.