Limericks from prompts 12

© Can Stock Photo& damedeeso. Used with permission

Limerick, a popular form of short, humorous verse that is often nonsensical and frequently ribald. It consists of five lines, rhyming aabba, and the dominant metre is anapestic, with two metrical feet in the third and fourth lines and three feet in the others. Encyclopaedia Britannica

A series of limericks produced in response to various prompts. These will appear on Saturday mornings wherever possible.

Where any prompt contains exactly five or letters, I may attempt an acrostic limerick based on that word (or a pair in the case of ten-letter prompts).

Let me know what you think.


for Kristian (

When I was about two or three
My mum introduced me to tea.
I tried it and cried
But my mum just replied,
That’s the drink of the true bourgeoisie.


for Kristian (

It’s true, I was near to ecstatic
At the news that I’m not symptomatic.
I felt so much better
Then I wrote a letter;
Misspelt and with errors grammatic.


for Kristian (

I drove all the way to Vaduz
For some good Liechtensteinian booze.
You may think it thick
But the sea makes me sick.
That’s why I won’t go on a cruise.


for Kristian (

There was a young woman called Valerie
Who just couldn’t live on her salary.
To prevent her demise
She made artworks from flies
And hung them all up in a gallery.


for Kristian (

Lithography – interesting word –
If you know to what it referred.
Forget all this hinting;
Why not just say printing?
To my mind, it’s simply absurd.


for Kristian (

My wife always drinks sparkling water,
A trait she passed on to our daughter.
If I gave her still
She’d take it so ill
I’d probably die of manslaughter


for Kristian (

To say this, I hope will be needless:
A well-tended lawn should be weedless.
That’s not how it looks
In a number of books
So here’s the thing: do more and read less!


for Kristian (

I’ve grown a new type of anemone;
It’s edible – tastes a bit lemony.
I can’t read the blurb,
It’s written in Serb
Or maybe a dialect of Yemeni.

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